Nigel Levings

(Period of ministry January 2009 – January 2010)

“Many are the plans in a mans’ heart, But it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” (Proverbs 19:21) Well, we had plans, didn’t we? And that’s not a bad thing. But God’s plans are so much richer, so much more rewarding. We started 2009 having all but installed Trevor Ntlhola as Team Leader to replace Gavin Brown. We were full of expectation for a year of applying ourselves to the vision to grow into a Reconciling and Resource Church.

The excitement did not last long. Trevor, the Oversight Team and our invited moderators; Alexander Venter and Bruce Boynes all agreed that Trevor should stand down for at least a year for recovery from his failed marriage. I agreed to stand in the gap as interim Team Leader, to hold Valley and to steer through this season with the help of the Oversight Team and Bruce and Alexander.

This became a place of struggle for most of us in our attempt to be church.

Possibly the greatest struggle for us in 2009 was to commune and congregate as Church in this “interim space”. A Church that was used to solid, purpose-oriented, functional leadership was now in a holding pattern. This was a frustrating place where there seemed to be no movement. We felt that we had lost our vitality, the life that made Valley Vineyard, Valley Vineyard.

This created a near existential crisis for us – a space where some questioned the very foundations of our life together. Many questioned whether our community had any meaning, purpose or value. We certainly felt rudderless. We noticeably felt the struggle.

Thomas Merton once said that; “Christian faith is a principle of questioning and struggle, before it becomes a principle of certitude and peace”.
Others have taught that; “we are formed only in struggle”.

Could this then be God’s rich and rewarding purpose for this “interim” year; God forming us through struggle as we are birthed into a new season for Valley Vineyard?

Maybe it is too soon to really know, but one truth is very clear – through prayer and fasting in 2009, the desolation that we felt transformed into consolation as we learned that God was present and purifying our hearts in the struggle.

In the place of prayerful meditation, desolation became our guide as He purified. He stood with us in our desolation. He became our consolation.

In desolation, we saw some hints of our many inappropriate attachments (things and activities that we cling to, to make us feel safe and good.) We saw the clearly dangerous and unacceptable attachments. We even started to see many that at first appeared benign. They all have one thing in common: -

They dull our capacity AND WILL to be present to the truth, presence and leading of God
(To live with a pure heart.)

If we have been formed into more maturity in this alone, the fruit and reward is rich in Christ. We have found more freedom and authority in Christ during 2009. We are ready for the next phase.

So, as we look into the future history of Valley Vineyard this is my one prayer:

That we are increasingly present to the Presence of God

Through the leading of God’s Holy Spirit

By the work and example of Christ

No matter what…